Other than setting fire to a forest, flying is the single worst thing an ordinary individual can do to cause climate change. The Age of Stupid
Flightlessness is about a year without flight. No planes. The events leading up to it run like this:
1. Dabble in ‘ethical living’ for 32 years. Start with the questions, ‘why don’t we throw out all our plates and use paper ones?’
1a have a mum who explains why.
2. Have a mum who is active in the Greens movement in Gippsland in the 80s and doesn’t get shot.
3. Dabble. This is an important word. Flightlessness would no doubt be easier for an extremist. Some rags to riches story about a Hummer owner who turns vegan. A much more interesting read. A seller. Like Peter Garret, but the other way around and with less disappointment.
4. Become vegetarian, ignoring the fact that fish aren’t plants. Call it something cute. Something you might call a fish, like aquatarian. (‘Come here Aquatarian, come on, dinner time!’)
5. Watch the 2004 tsunami on TV. Become an aid worker. Fly everywhere.
7. Read ‘it’s better to be a vegan in a Hummer than a meat eater on a bicycle’ in a toilet.
8. Fall in love with a climate change comedian.
9. Indulge him by watching ‘The Age of Stupid’ one night instead of ‘Breaking Bad’.
9a fight.
9b. cry.
9c. hug.
10. Give up planes.